Why Midlife Demands a New Definition of Success
- Rosie Nixon
- 4 hours ago
- 5 min read
There are moments in this work where I have to pause and breathe it all in, because something truly special happens in the room. Last week's Rosie’s Reinvention Retreat was one of those moments. A day where midlife women gathered not to tick things off a 'to do' list or achieve more, but to ask ourselves this radical question: What does success mean to me now?
It sounds simple. But in midlife, when our roles, responsibilities, hormones, identity and priorities are shifting, this question of what success means to you, becomes a chance to rewrite the script you may have been living by for years, even decades.
As I sit here now reflecting, feeling inspired and grateful, I’m reminded why my Reinvent Like a PRO™ formula is so powerful. Because reinvention doesn’t begin with action. It begins with awareness. With presence. With courage to step out of your comfort zone. With taking a breath!
It begins when you choose to Pause, Reflect, and Organise.
By the time you reach your 40s, 50s and beyond, you’ve lived through enough seasons and life events to know that success is not a fixed destination. It is messy and non-linear, yet many of us are still carrying definitions we inherited years ago:
Success as achievement
Success as productivity or 'busyness'
Success as being everything to everyone
Success as looking “put together”
Success as the highest pay grade
Success as never dropping a ball
These scripts were often written for us, not by us. And they rarely take into account the complexity, wisdom and lived experience of midlife. This is why success becomes so important to define - because without clarity success defaults to external influence and measures. Life becomes stressful, burnout hits. With clarity success becomes personal, meaningful and sustainable. We find a purpose and have more energy for work and life.
The PRO Formula: Reinventing Success From the Inside Out
Reinvent Like a PRO™ forms the structure of all of my retreats. It is simple, but it’s not fluff. It’s a structured, compassionate way to redesign your life from the inside out, backed by neuroscience and real experiences.
Most people try to live it backwards. They jump straight to Organise:
New notebook
New planning session
New job search
New request for a pay rise
But organising without pausing and reflecting is like building a house on sand. It looks impressive, but it won’t stay up.
P is for Pause: Calming the nervous system and creating space
Granting yourself permission to pause is the most underestimated power move in midlife.
During the retreat, the pause happened the soon after we stepped into the room. When Chinese Medicine Practitioner, Katie Brindle, led us in a guided breath-work and meditation session, I could feel shoulders drop and the energy calm in the room.
A pause doesn't have to be guided, it can be as simple as:
A deep breath in and out
A moment of silence before you answer a question
A walk without looking at your phone
A weekend without plans
A long bath
A decision to 'sleep on it' before reacting
Pausing is about soothing the nervous system so you can move forwards from a place of calm.
R is for Reflect: Getting Honest About What Matters Now
Reflection is where the real work happens.
Together, we explored:
Values — What truly matters in this season
Needs — What your mind, body and heart are asking for
Strengths — The gifts you’ve earned through lived experience
Stories — The narratives you’ve outgrown
Success scripts — The ones you inherited vs. the ones you want to write
There were moments of laughter, tears, surprise, and emotion, when someone’s truth silenced the whole room. We navigated how we wanted to communicate what success means to us in a session with communications startegist Priscilla Pollara using LEGO bricks. Yes, LEGO! It was unexpectedly emotional and profound to use play as a tool to communicate our stories.
As you reflect on how you would like to show up in the world, remember that reflection is not about judging your past self. It’s about honouring your experiences and who you are now.
O is for Organise: Turning insight into aligned action
Only after pausing and reflecting do we move into organise mode.
This is where you take your new definition of success and begin shaping your life around it, through grounded, sustainable shifts.
Organising might look like:
Protecting time for what matters most
Setting boundaries that honour your energy
Creating rituals that support your wellbeing
Asking for help instead of carrying everything alone
Choosing work that aligns with your values
Saying no without guilt
Saying yes without apology
At the retreat, we explored what these shifts could look like in real life.
Your Midlife Success, Redefined
If you’re reading this and feeling the nudge to redefine success for yourself, here’s a simple starting point:
Try this one-sentence prompt:
“Right now, success means living in a way that honours my values of ________, ________, and ________.”
And if you missed the retreat this time, don’t worry. More dates are coming soon, and I cannot wait to welcome you into the room.
Oh, and the goodie bag of midlife dreams? That deserves a photo all of its own.
One guest summed things up nicely for me, messaging in our WhatsApp community (you are invited to join once you've attended a retreat): 'For me, the day served as a powerful reminder of how far I've come and how much I've evolved... it also gave me total clarity; I've found my voice and have 20/20 vision on exactly where I want to take my business.'
What could be more precious than this?
New Reinvention Retreats dates coming soon - watch this space!
Love
